Work life is littered with difficult decisions, and the more senior you get, the more of them there are. Strategic direction, responding to the turbulence of the market, trying to do something new. This product or that. This extra service or not. This office move or not. Pricing. Marketing. Supply chain. Processes.

There are consequences and compromises in almost every decision. Some are driven by an urgent imperative and so maybe seem more straightforward. Others are a matter of judgement, and managing the multiplicity of opinions about the right choice.

Almost every one of those decisions affects a person. Moving to a new office. Stopping a particular product. Moving your manufacturing operation somewhere else. Needing fewer people. Introducing new ways of working or a new IT system.

People are where it gets complicated. Some people are threatened by change. Others are energised. Some people challenge your every thought process. Some say nothing but quietly resist everything you try to achieve. Some are outright aggressive. Others might support you to your face but undermine you behind your back.

You can never please all the people all the time, and that’s especially true as a senior leader. I see it repeatedly, leaders spending huge amounts of time and emotional energy on the (often quite small number of) people who resist or don’t like it. Of course you can’t ignore it, but sometimes you have to accept that some people won’t be with you.

That means you have to find confidence from within. You need to be convinced that you’re doing the right thing, for the right reasons. You need to be able to withstand the hostility you might face. You need to be stand firmly and calmly in what you believe. You need to develop the capacity to make and communicate tough decisions, and how to hold your line with the very small number of people who won’t get on board.

Developing your capacity to do this stuff is a crucial part of your growth as a leader. If you instinctively dislike conflict (you are not alone!), this might be one of the hardest things you need to learn. You may never be entirely comfortable with it, but you can certainly develop the ability to manage your tendency to avoid it and learn to trust that you know how to do it as well as these things can be done. As with many things in life, the more we do it, the easier it gets and the more we embed the skills we need.

Getting some help is crucial, knowing you can talk it through with someone who can guide and advise you, someone you can put your head in your hands with and admit you hate it or messed it up without fear of consequences. You need that support from somewhere in your working life. Hopefully you will have a trusted colleague you can rely on, but if not, look for a coach or a mentor., within or beyond your organisation.

These things are always easier when you’re not on your own.